The Starting Line

A few people told me today that I needed to start a blog. Ummmm, okay. I don’t know quite where to start, but everyone has to start somewhere, right? So….here goes. Here is a little about me and my take on stuff. It is worth mentioning here at the beginning that I say whatthefuckever is on my mind, and alot of time that includes saying four letter words. You have been warned.

First, [SNORT] obviously isn’t my given name. That would make my mother and father total assholes, wouldn’t it? I participate in a lively forum and [SNORT] is my handle there; me and my rocket good cyber girlfriends snark about bad business practices, bad photography, bad food, bad financial decisions, lying, wordsmithing, and lots of fun (and touching) OT stuff. It’s a long story, but you will just have to take my word that [SNORT] is hilarious and very fitting. But, for normalcy’s sake, I’ll go by CJ.

About me? Well, here are the basics:

• I always tell the truth. I am honest. I am blunt. I will call people out on their bullshit. Don’t get me wrong….I am respectful, tactful, and nice, but if you ask for my opinion I will tell you what I think. I used to lie many many years ago but gave it up in college after it made my life complicated.
• I have NEVER smoked a cigarette.
• I have two beautiful sons, G (age 6) and P (currently 9 months).
• I am married to J, who is my second husband. I was married once before to a bastard of a gentleman who enjoyed cheating, drugs, and abuse. I don’t like to talk about him, but I’m sure I will at some point.
• I was a practicing RN for 10 years. My areas of specialty were ER, ICU, telemetry, and post-cardiac surgery. I also tried labor & delivery (so NOT my cup-o-tea), head/spinal injury rehabilitation, transplant, and worked as a clinical documentation specialist. My career led to burnout, which led to depression, which led to drug use, which led to rehab, which led to me being totally happy and enjoying life once again. Again, I’m sure I’ll talk about this shit at some point. But I have no secrets. If I’ve piqued your interest then just ask what you want to know.
• I love, love, love to cook and really want to go to culinary school. I am, however, gearing up for gastric bypass surgery next month, so choosing an educational path that requires alot of tasting isn’t really smart right now. School will have to wait a year or two. Besides, I didn’t want to have to deal with the “fat chick majoring in food” comments and stares.
• I’ve been told I’m funny. And random. My mind never, ever shuts off. Seriously. I catch myself thinking and wondering the weirdest things, and alot of times I’ll blurt it out. I seem to be missing a crucial filter that runs between my brain and my mouth. I dunno.
• I am a woman, yes, but I am not your consummate girly girl. I hate chick flicks and sad movies, Hallmark cards, stuffed animals, love songs, diaries, poetry, and pastel colors. I cuss like a fucking sailor, prefer a cold beer to some pussy mixed drink with an umbrella perched atop a pineapple wedge, and I have a wicked sense of humor. I do, however, enjoy shopping and a good mani/pedi.
• Diversity and tolerance delight me to no end. Tall, short, thin, fat, white, non-white, religious, atheist, gay, straight, etc. I value everyone for their individuality and what they bring to the table. Just don’t try and force your views on me. I respect and value everyone’s opinions and beliefs just as long as they are not shoved down my throat.
• I am a born and raised Georgia girl who has been stuck in Arizona for almost 9 years. Me and J didn’t plan on settling down here; it just sort of happened. So whenever I refer to my parents, my family, or “going home,” I am talking about Georgia!

That about does it for tonight. I guess here I can talk about what I want and not get so off topic at my other internet place of residence. It’s almost 11:00 pm here; I’m off to spend some time with the hubby and wrangle a backrub out of him.

Goodnight, y’all.