*can’t think of a title*

I can’t think of a good name for this blog entry, so it shall have the above generic name.

Here in the land of [SNORT] things are going well. In 5 weeks I am down 28 pounds; I weighed in at 265.5 pounds today. I find that my weight tends to fluctuate a little based on how much salt I consume, so I’m trying to lay off of it. For the past week or two I have been having awful nausea. The surgeon has given me Zofran pills and a Scopolamine patch to wear behind my ear, and they have helped. It is a challenge to get in all of my fluids for the day (water, Crystal Light, iced tea with Splenda). My tummy pouch has expanded a little, but I still can’t eat the recommended 1/2 cup meal size. Just to give you an idea of what my diet is like, here is what I have eaten today:


Breakfast:  I scrambled one large egg, and I managed to eat half of it.

Lunch:  I made half a sandwich on the thin, round slices of bread. I had low fat pastrami, reduced fat provolone, and some Grey Poupon because I’m a fucking snob like that. After two bites I felt like my stomach was going to pop; the bread was taking up so much room! I waited half an hour then ate most of the meat and cheese sans bread.

Dinner:  1/3 cup of grilled chicken breast with salsa and two pieces of sauteed zucchini (the rule is one bite of veggies for every 3 bites of protein).


I have found that I tolerate refried beans and edamamme very well, but proteins like chicken and ground beef fill me up. Grilled fish fills me up too. I have literally learned how to eat all over again. I’m not joking. If I eat too fast I will vomit. If I eat even one spoonful more than I should I vomit. I eat with one of 6-inch’s baby spoons, and I wait 3 or so minutes in between bites to make sure I’m not too full before I eat more.

And, since I am not the person to hold anything back for the sake of being delicate (LOL), let me say that I am constipated more often than not. Milk of Magnesia is my new friend, but I feel like I am rectally excreting a Buick. You’re welcome.


In other news, I want to brag about J for a bit. J is an electrical engineer, and he works for a company that designs electrical stuff for airplanes. He and his team have been working on a design problem for TWO YEARS. Two fucking years, people. When he took time off to help me after surgery he did alot, alot of thinking about said problem. He came up with a solution he hoped would work. He sent it to the guys at work, they tested it, and found that it worked spectacularly. When he returned to work after Thanksgiving the boss told him that his design worked so well and was so innovative that they are going to apply for a US Patent, and J’s name will be on it! How fucking awesome is that? When he told me that I jumped off the couch, screamed, and had to call my parents and Brother Snort to tell them. I am so proud of him. ♥

Footlong and 6-inch are doing great. We have a speech therapy evaluation for 6-inch on Monday morning (thanks to all you MWOPers for your advice!), and I’m looking forward to hearing her assessment. He is 16 months old and has not said a single word so far. Footlong, on the other hand, never shuts up! This kid will talk about anything and everything, and he makes me laugh every single day. He loves to play with his little brother, and they get along well together. Our Christmas tree is up, and 6-inch has gone from “Wow! What is all this shit! I want to pull everything off and eat it!” to a more laid back, “Eh, it’s still here” kind of mood. I can’t wait for Christmas! Santa Claus bought 6-inch a ride-on train that rides on a circular track at a cool 1.5 mph; Santa also bought him a little toddler playground that has a slide, a little tiny rock climbing wall, and other fun little things. Santa Claus is bringing Footlong all of the Angry Birds Star Wars playsets, as requested. As for Mommy and Daddy gifts to the boys, we bought one large gift:  an inflatable jumpy castle (with enclosed ball pit!) for the back yard. That thing was only $199 on Cyber Monday. That is when I did all of my shopping:  Cyber Monday. 6-inch’s playground was only $69 (with free shipping!). I don’t care for the idea of Black Friday. The thought of getting up at 3:00 am to fight someone over a $3.00 Fry Daddy seems a bit ridiculous to me, but to each his own.

I hope each and every one of you is doing well. I will get J to take some photos of me this weekend  🙂

Love to you all!


22 thoughts on “*can’t think of a title*

  1. I can’t wait to see pictures! And what wonderful news to share about the fam. I love hearing all this positive stuff – good vibes all around!!!

  2. Good to hear from you Snort! I am so sorry you’re dealing with bad nausea. It’s a miserable state to be in. Hope it passes soon. Do you feel any different or notice a change in the way your clothes fit since being down 28 pounds?

    • I am noticing a difference in my clothes, particularly my pants. My most noticeable weight loss is in my stomach, so my pants are looser. I got into a pair of blue jeans yesterday that I haven’t been able to wear in nearly 2 years. I had to suck it in, but they fit!

  3. Snort, I work in pediatric nursing with special needs children and I’m no therapist but I can tell you that kids with talkative older siblings seem to go one if two ways… They pick up on language very quickly and are very articulate, OR they stay quiet and allow the older sibling to do ALL the talking. Regardless I think getting him an eval was a smart thing to do! I have a fourteen month old who hasn’t said too awful much… If he hasn’t made any changes by his next checkup I’m certainly going to mention it… Just my two cents so hopefully you won’t worry TOO much!

    • Thank you for telling me that! Footlong, indeed, is the verbal one in the family. I actually had a back-and-forth conversation with him when he was 18 months old; we talked about french fries and how good they were. LOL

  4. So glad to hear that you are doing well!!! I found you from MWOP and can I just say…THANK YOU for the laughs! You make my sometimes crummy days!

  5. First off .. Congrats Carmen for doing so good on your journey. I would have an awful time with the waiting between bites (having 7 kids made me learn to eat fast if I wanted food hot)…hence the extra 100 pounds I am carrying around myself!.. Tell Mr. Snort that we are super proud of him. How about a BONUS for all that problem solving !! Glad to hear that the kids are good… I wanted to say..Our youngest also was very slow at verbalizing much. He had 6 others to talk for him, entertain him and there was no need for him to say a darn thing and they would do stuff for him. That also went for learning to pick up toys too! He still is my problem kid on getting his chores done. So here’s to the strong silent type and getting some reassurance that little man is just waiting to talk your ear off. Love ya! cindy

    • Thanks, Cindy! We’re hoping that J gets another promotion and raise in March with his annual evaluation.

      We ended up having to cancel the speech therapy appt for Monday morning because Footlong was sick all weekend with a stomach bug; we thought it was just rude to invite someone in to our home when we had a sick kid puking everywhere. Love you too my friend!

  6. All that time, energy, and pain for the surgery… and YOU’RE EATING PASTRAMI!!!! OMG I lost over 100 lbs. and I have to say, KNOCK IT OFF!!

    And you are constipated because you are eating very little and not drinking enough water. Change your food to include more fruit, water, and you’ll feel much better.

    Remember, there are a ton of fatties that have gained back a lot or all of what they lost with surgery (Al Roker, anyone?), be careful. This is a jump start to a lifestyle change, not a free pass.

    My fave was mentioning the cheese was low-fat, LOL, denial anyone? Doesn’t matter if the cheese is low-fat when you put it with pastrami!!!

    • You’re entitled to your opinions, Skinny Minny. Congrats on your weight loss.

      Hillshire Farms makes a lunchmeat pastrami that is 70 calories, 1.5 g fat, and 11 g protein for 2 oz serving size.

      The reduced fat provolone is 80 calories, 5 g fat, and 8 g protein for one slice.

      That said, 150 calories, 6.5 g fat, and 19 g protein is within my per-meal caloric allotments.

      With gastric bypass patients the focus is on protein first, and reduced fat cheeses, lean lunchmeats, eggs, chicken, fish, turkey, lean ground beef, and beans are on the list of things I can eat and easily digest. So far I have not tolerated fruit because the sugar causes dumping syndrome. Being able to start eating veggies last week has helped with the regularity.

      You’re welcome to share your opinions and your own journey here, but if you continue to be rude and condescending I’m not going to publish anymore of your comments. I am on my OWN journey; I’m not Al Roker, Carnie Wilson, or Star Jones. I am following my doctors instructions to a T, and he is pleased with my progress. His feedback, as far as I am concerned, is the feedback I want.

    • Um… I believe that Snort knows exactly what she can and cannot eat. Why come here and act like a fool? Perhaps if you did lose 100 pounds you would be more understanding and be encouraging. Just sayin…

    • There are nicer ways of wording things than how you just did it. If you think she might want advice on proper foods, you could have at least said, “Pastrami isn’t the healthiest choice in lunch meats. I really enjoy eating _____ though. You might like it too.” I am having WLS next month and in preparation have been reading lots of blogs and watching videos on youtube. In the comment sections I keep reading about how upset people are with many people in the WLS community who have become nasty and mean. Instead of supporting each other, they are apparently tearing each other down. I couldn’t understand this and personally hadn’t seen any evidence of it… until now. Being nice can go a long way. It is a shame some bad apples are ruining it for everyone else.

  7. Fantastic news Snort .. on the the weight loss and on your hubbie’s news .. that’s rocket good :o)
    I can’t believe you’ve lost 2 st in 5 weeks .. absolutely wonderful, you must be chuffed to bits.
    Don’t worry about the wee fella … in a short while you’ll be tellng us he never stops talking :o) I’m glad you’re getting the evaluation done though, it’ll help put your mind at rest.

  8. Thanks, Arse! I am chuffed indeed 🙂 Yesterday I wore an old pair of black track pants around the house, and J kept looking at me. I finally snapped, “What are you looking at?” He laughed and said, “Those pants are starting to hang off your ass!” That made my day.

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