It has been a boring summer thus far at Casa Snort. Since 6-inch goes down for his nap anywhere between 10:30 and noon we do our errands, outdoor play, and activities after his nap. Today after his nap we are going grocery shopping. Fun, right?
So the other day on MWOP some of you probably read on the OT side my freak out about family coming to visit and my only getting 4 hours advance notice. Yeah, I fucking LOVE how my mother and grandmother forget to tell me things. My cousins, Carol and Trae, live in GA but drove out to Phoenix to get their 6 year old granddaughter, K, to bring her home for the summer so she could see her dad (Carol and Trae’s son). While I was absolutely beyond thrilled to see family since we haven’t been home in nearly two years the preparations about killed me. I had a full on panic attack because the house literally looked like a bomb went off. It was laundry day, so we had a giant pile of towels, a giant pile of sheets and blankets, a basket of 6-inch’s clothes, Footlong’s hamper, and some of our clothes that needed to be washed. Cheerios and other tidbits littered the carpet, and I hadn’t done the dishes. 6-inch was fighting going down for a nap when I got the phone call from my mom asking what time they would be arriving. As this was a complete shock I said “Fuck” several times in true Snort fashion then got my ass in gear. They were able to pick K up yesterday and left Phoenix this morning headed home. They passed back by (Carol called last night to give me a heads up!) so I could meet little K. Oh my word what a sweet and beautiful little girl she is! I had gotten her a big Hello Kitty bag and filled it up with all kinds of Hello Kitty items and some candy. She and Footlong played and jumped together in our bouncy house. 6-inch, oddly enough, clung to Trae for dear life. I don’t know if Trae spritzed himself with toddler pheromones or what, but 6-inch was stuck to him like white on rice.
I went to TJ Maxx the other day and bought 4 pair of Guess heels and platforms ($400 retail) for about $90. J also let me order some tops from Old Navy since I am down to very few wearable shirts other than my exercising tanks. Here is a photo of me modeling one (with one of my new pair of leopard print Guess slingback heels):
In my own defense I probably would have looked better with some makeup. And the built-in shelf bra obviously can’t handle my ladies; I need a strapless bra.
As we cannot afford airfare to fly to GA and visit family we have decided to purchase season passes for a variety of Tucson activities. We have a family membership to the YMCA, and I haven’t been able to exercise really other than walking because of my back pain. I’ve finally gotten medical clearance from the doctor to begin a supervised exercise program, so hopefully I’ll be losing more weight in the coming weeks as I’ve seen at a plateau (82 lbs) for a couple of weeks. We bought season passes to the Tucson Children’s Museum, and it is a wonderful facility. We also broke down and took advantage of a Groupon to get discounted season passes to the one waterpark here in Tucson. If you go 2 or 3 times the passes pay for themselves. I’ll be honest: the waterpark here fucking sucks. It is old, and with the severe heat here in Tucson during the day and cooler temps at night the slides have really taken a beating. There are 7 adult slides, and they are all warped and bumpy as hell. The waterflow will not even flow in a straight line down the middle of the slide during a straight segment—the water rushes all over the bumps and crannies and you have no control at all. I honestly thought at one point I was going to do a full 360 because at times I was riding so high on the wall of the slide. The boys enjoy the kids area, and 6-inch has fallen in love with one baby water slide. Both boys like the wave pool. We have to wear SPF 50 sunscreen and reapply it every hour to prevent sunburns, but hey, that’s what you get for living in the desert. At least the water park allows you to bring in containers of water and ice.
We offered to buy Mother and Father Snort plane tickets to come out and visit us, but Mother Snort has just started a new job and has no vacation time. After much convincing Father Snort agreed to come, and he arrives July 2nd and will stay for one week. We’re excited, and I know Dad is excited to get his hands on his grandkids.
I painted my toenails last night.
I cooked dinner last night (steak, spicy sautéed green beans with garlic, and corn on the cob), and thankfully there are enough leftovers for tonight because it is too fucking hot to cook.
Monsoon season starts officially on July 1st, and while I absofuckinglutely dread the humidity and miserable conditions inside the house (because we have a swamp cooler) I can’t wait to see and hear thunderstorms and smell rain. I miss the smell of rain. I also miss the smell of freshly cut grass.
I subscribe to the monthly Pop Sugar Must Have boxes ($35/month for a bunch of goodies guaranteed to have a retail value over $100), and the June box arrived. I literally let out a MckMama “Squeeeeeeeeeeeee!” when I found that one of the items in the box was the sequel to the novel “The Devil Wears Prada.” The sequel is entitled “Revenge Wears Prada.” It is set 10 years in the future and Andy and Emily (Miranda’s other assistant) have started their own magazine. So far it’s great, and I enjoyed reading “The Devil Wears Prada” as well.
After seeing maxi-pad and tampon commercials Footlong asked me was a period was. I explained menstruation, and while he understood everything he was totally grossed out. He then rationalized that if women didn’t have periods that there would be no people on Earth because babies couldn’t be born. Smart little whippersnapper he is.
I am enjoying, as always, seeing the unedited photos of MckMama that flow in during various Xyng trips. There was one of her posted yesterday of her hiking; it was taken from behind, and she is large and in charge from the waist up. Literally. She looked like a corn-fed white boy playing in the NFL.
That’s all folks. xoxo